WHAT CALL OF DUTY(cod) REALLY IS
Carlos is 93 years old, living alone in his apartment after his wife "E-coli" died of brain cancer. Carlos has been very depressed ever since and has tried medication but it only fills in a few chips of his life that have broken off. Carlos has seen things that make him have nightmares, and make him sit up in bed and yell ," NO GET AWAY, I CANT TAKE IT, THE.....CARE BEARS. TO SCARY!" Carlos served in WWII and can remember all the memories.
"huh!?" what?, oh it was just a dream." " was i just having a dream narrating my own life???" "damn,...i suck." "i need to lay off the friendly's ice cream.." Carlos was just dozing off again, when suddenly...A GIANT FLYING ICE CREAM TRUCK FALLS THROUGH THE CEILING, No.. im just kidding thats not what happens...lala..O YA, back to the story. anyway Carlos was dozing off when suddenly he hit the sandy ground and felt sharp pains in his leg. he looked all around himself but saw only soldiers, patching up his right thigh. "what is going on? where am i?" " Carlos its me, alaxander!' " You got sniped in the thigh and your lucky it missed your artery, you could be dead right now." " ok, but where the hell am I!?" carlos asked. " WERE fightin japan right now, man!, your all patched up, now get out there and fight!" "uhh, uhh! I cant im too old..wait im Young again!" "NO shit your young!, now go this isnt play time!" alaxander yelled.
Carlos ran outside the little safe hiddin tent with doctors and gentle, well, kinda gentle hands, into the gunfire and death. "ahhHHHH!" carlos yelled as flew behind some oil cans in a ditch. there was a japanese corpse, and what looked like a type 99 machine gun. Carlos scrambled through the pockets lookin for anything helpful. " Lets see, two grenades, ammo, a maroon 5 Cd, and a flash grenade. He took the maroon 5 CD and ran out of the ditch. all of the sudden everythinf froze, time the wind, even things falling had stopped in mid air as this black screen came up and read out " leave game" "save now" " and "save and quit". then strangly the save and quit sign lighted up, and then everything went black soon after. then a voice, seeming to come from no where jusat said " Damn, campaign is boring, lets play some live." Carlos had no idea where the voice came from or what "live" even meant. "this is weird, its as if im in my own mind, just i feel like im outside, alive breathing concious and everything, but im not. a a very weird feeling indeed, yes, quiet.."
Then suddenly another scream popped up similar as the one before, except it filled up the entire what seemed to be a screen. being so amazed but scared, Carlos didnt even notice the voices come again and say things like " dude, you prestieged again?" and "ooh wow nice class, is that new?" Carlos had no idea what any of this even meant. but the screen was gray and it had a list of weird names sort of like codes. wthere was 8 of them out of 12 apparently as what is said at the bottom of the weird screen. It said in a corner "Firing Range" and a picture of what seemed to be a firing range. Cralos read over then names. these are some very weird names, i wonder what they mean? "hmm lets see...[NBP5] I HaTE jb" XYomamaisFAAAt, what did all these mean? some of the name code things had a bracket in front of them with 4 letter in them. But then suddenly the screen went black for a few seconds, then the picture of the firing range in black and white with a loading bar on it, with the words "team deathmatch" written across it. "oh NO" "a loading bar, does this mean im going back to the war again? or back to my home?" the the screen went black and white and then suddenly Cralos came ack to conciousness.
"huh?" "where am i?" "ugh, i cant move!" "...!" Carlos was what seemed like the firing range! except everything was black and white as these strange yellow numbers counted down from 15 to 1, but around 5 the screen turned from black and white to colours. everything was sandy and brown. then a voice came out of nowhere and said " TEAM DEATHMATCH" "do you what you were told to do destroy all enemys" then Carlos could move. There was this strange thing that seemed like a mini map in videogames in the top right corner of his eye. but it was always in the top right corner, if he looked at the top right corner of the top right corner, it would always be at the top right corner no matter what. carlos realized he was moving but he wasnt controlling himself. "WHAT IS THIS CRAZY WITCHCRAFT BULLSHIT THAT I MUST GO THROUGH!" "WHY ME!" then suddenly carlos was shot and dead. "ohh, the pain.." its happening, all over again.. " Carlos saw bright lights and starts and pictures of what seemed to be DOra the explorer's face saying "we can do it!" When suddenly, Cralos reappeared alive, fin, concious, the pain gone. "what the hell is going on!?" he ran up a dirt path with bean bags and into a steel walled, garage house thing, with only a set of stairs and a car hanging from the ceiling by chains. the strange phycic force moved him upstairs. and to look out a large window. outside there was a watchotwer and a wooden house garage similar to the one he was in across from him. there was another guy in there and he was shooting at carlos! "ahh" suddenly Carlos held his gun to his eye and cross fired at the ather guy for about 3 seconds when suddenly in white letters with red background said "headshot" +50" it was similar to the map though if he trieed to look at it, it would always just stay right on the top of the screen, its just that it disappeard after seconds. suudenly Cralos heard the voices again " AWW YEAH!, headshot!" and "ohh, nice job, Bro!"
This continued on for about 10 minutes. Death after death, kill after kill. it was like being in a videogame.
Then suddenly, out of no where i froze again, everything froze again, just like before. a screen came up and said DEFEAT and then it said tow teams, and..points it seemed like. one team named black ops got 5,500 points and another team called spetsnaz got 7500. considering i "lost" i guess i was part of black ops team. then this screen came up that said after action report. apparently, i gained 2367 XP and got 439 cod points. yet, i hav no idea what any of this crap means, and i just want to go home!!!!" the suddenly a care bear with a chainsaw, came out of no wehere and started chasing Carlos around."ahhh NO!" then more came each with a difrent weapon. they tortured carlos for a long time, but then, they brought out there secret weapon... the jersey shore! "OH NO!" I CANT TAKE THEPAIN ANYMORE, JUST KILL ME!
All they were doing was jumping around and partying and some guido guys were punching eachother in the face. some really ugly gross thing i found out was a human being named snookie was going around eating pickles and humping people and calling everyone "bitch." it was a sight that will never leave my mind, and will forever be burned into my brain.
Then suddenly, out of no where, Carlos woke up in his bed again. "am i really home again? or is it just my mind playing another trick on me to make me happt then just kill me again?" Carlos suddenly found out he was home, he could tell becuase when he listened to his Ipod, nickleback, maroon 5, and fall out boy all sounded korny and terrible again, what a relief. "i just relized i could die, or go into some weird dream of dark oblivion that would overcome my life!" i need to make a list of everything i have to do before i die!
5 days later..... Carlos checked a box of a list. "ok lets see, kill taylor lautner, kill justin bieber, go back in time and get a signature of kurt cobain, punch Bon Jovi in the face, set maroon 5's stage on fire, go to every Mcdonalds on the globe, and destroy every picture and statue of Ronald Mcdonald, go to keziah's house and tell her paramore sucks, and find and sll a lepreacuan." MY LIFE IS A SUCCESS!!!
written and edited by
JAKE-ME
sorry about any spelling issues, i kind of just rished through this. ;PPPPP
